MinXus Mail Bag: Miss Rebecca Guyver (Suffolk, UK) raises the delicate matter of minks at the dinner table

Mail-art by Rebecca Guyver (Suffolk, UK)

Miss Becca, I am answerin’ this card myself as it is an important matter for all tenderfoots. What I have to tell you will likely help avoid many heinous incidents. First, thank you for the piturs:

Miss Becca, if you choose to let your chickens walk about on the table during your dinner time, that is squarely your decision as it is your chicken ranch. Under no circumstances, however, should minks be allowed to run loose on the table during meal time. First, it aint civilized. Second, Dw used to let the minks run loose on the table at chow time. Now I have warned tenderfoots many a time minks aint domesticated and they aint pets.

If a mink likes what you got on your plate, the mink will take it. And the mink will fight you over it, which is exactly what Dw learnt the hard way in an incident involving him and not one but three minks that had been roamin around on the table and decided to help themselves to his heapin plate of tuna casserole.

Miss Becca, I aint gonna describe to you bout the blood and carnage as I know you are sensitive to the pain and misfortunes of others. I will tell you Dw lost that fight with the minks over the tuna casserole fair and square. If I hadn’t a pulled out my gun and fired off a round into the ceiling, which was enough to send the minks scrambling to their sheds, Dw would have scars to remember that mink fight to this day.

I would generally advise all tenderfoots to keep wild animals outside where they belong.


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Minkoo
    Nov 03, 2012 @ 03:38:28

    I would say, it depends. The minks at the Manoir don’t have the privilege of a farm and free-range life. We all need to co-habitate within our humble walls, and I have to say those minks are very educated. And they will eat leftover curry.


  2. suffolkrebecca
    Nov 04, 2012 @ 18:22:35

    No tuna casserole here. I understand it’s pheasant on the menu, so will tripple bolt the door and make sure to wash the dishes promptly. I hope that’s enough precaution. BTW. I noticed that this month’s poetry context at Lit Review is HAIR!


  3. minxususa
    Nov 04, 2012 @ 19:26:18

    And dont leave ’em no bones, Miss Becca. They”ll choke on the bones. Thats a might fine kitchen at your ranch with runnin water right there an all.


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